What are my options

What are my options? Really what are my options?
I have already cried as much as I could.
I have fought the feeling as much as I could.
I have denied it for as long as I could.
I have missed her as much as I could.
I have prayed as much as I could.
I have thought about her as much as could.
I have pretended she is just away for as long as I could.
I have angered her as much as I could.
I have mailed her as much as I could.
I have tried to reach out to her as much as I could.
I have tried to call her as much as I could.
I have begged her and God as much as I could.
What are my options really what else can I do?

I can't call her, I dont know where.
I can't mail her, she doesnt reply.
I can't send flowers she might take it wrongly.
I can't call friends she will take it as stalking.
I can't show up at her place that will scare her more.

I can just think about her, but where will it get me.
I can talk to her inside me, but that will make me crazy.
I can think of better times, but that will only make me miss her more.
I can only pray to God that maybe someday she will come back.